The Follow Up
Two
days had passed since the incident happened, but it still bothers me. My
daughter was dropped off this morning, and the departing words of her mother
were: “give your brother, his cookies.” After having dropped our son off, two
days earlier, and not calling once to check on him, the only mention of his
name from her was about him getting some cookies that she sent in a bag; unbelievable! No mention of her missing him and that she
hated to return him home early. This's the part which bothered me the most;
because, I should not be the only one who feels this way about our son. Nevertheless,
she just gave the final instruction to our daughter, and off she went.
What was my reaction after the first phone call?
My initial thought
was why she would ask me that question
about bringing her to his medication. After all, my car is broken (which is
knows this) and she has transportation. Once she decided to keep the kids on Friday,
she could have picked up his medicine. Originally, I was told that she would
only be off on Christmas Eve (Wednesday) and Christmas Day (Thursday), which
usually meant that the kids would return home on Friday. I figured that it
would be okay because I would give him his medicine after he got home. However,
she decided to keep them; while being fully aware that she did not have his
medicine.
The Bottom Line
According to
Google Maps, she stays 2 miles from my apartment, and it is a 6 minute drive to
her place. If she wanted our son to have his medicine; then she would have driven
to get it!
Actions speak louder than words!
On Thanksgiving
Day, she picked the kids up before they ate dinner. When the kids told her they
were hungry, she called me. I explained that she picked them up prior to them
eating their dinner. Guess what happened next? She drove back to my place got
their dinner, and “claimed” that she did not have any food or money; then she explained
that she will go grocery shopping and cook the following day.
What was my reaction after the
second phone call?
Honestly,
I do not care about how much it would cost her to replace their tablets. I was
more concerned with what caused my son to break something that he enjoys. My
other thoughts were, where was the babysitter? How could my son break two
tablets on the same day? My son knows how to plug up an iPads to charge it. Recently,
he was caught charging up his iPad Mini he received this year for Christmas
from me. My thoughts forced me to think about endless scenarios; such as, why
did the other little boy let my son break his tablet? Was my son alone with two
tablets? Once again, where was the babysitter?
The Bottom Line
My son loves and
enjoys electronic devices, but his favorite device is an iPad. He would not
break an iPad unless something was wrong with it.
The Knock at the door!
One
hour later, after the second phone call ended, there was a knock at my door. My
son and his mother stood before me. I did not get an explanation as to why she only
had him. Furthermore, she was not there to pick up his medicine; instead she
dropped him off. Finally, I asked what time our daughter will return home. She
replied she was not ready to leave because she was having fun, but she will
return her home tonight. It was not easy, but I held my words and closed the
door. Her behavior is just ridiculous; because, she was willing to make two
separate trips to drop off each child, but not willing to make one trip to get
his medicine verses returning him home.
Winners & Losers
Obviously,
I felt that my daughter and her mother were the “only major” winners. The mother
of my children got to spend an extra day and ½ with only our daughter. In fact,
it was more than just our daughter, the son of her boyfriend and their daughter
together were there as well. My daughter was happy because she finally got to
spend additional time with her mother without her brother.
Surprisingly,
there’s a small part of me that believed that my son won too. My destroyer of tablets
appeared pleased with his mother's decision to return him home. Without any prompting,
he cleaned his room and was not upset when I did not give him his iPad that
night. Instead, he appeared to be a little disappointed, but he played on the computer
with no problems. While I prepared his dinner, he found his sister’s tablet
which is not an iPad and he did not break it. He even put it back in the box where
he found it. Later on, he found his iPad Mini, plugged it into the charger, and
played with it together with the computer.
I
also feel as if he lost; because, he has never been alone with his mother
without his sister. I realized that it is completely possible for her to give
him quality one on one time with his sister present, but I do not believe this has
happened. I found out from my daughter, my son returned home because he did not
have medicine. And that her mother returned to her place with crawfish after
dropping our son off, and that was unfortunate because my son loves crawfish.
So he missed out on crawfish; as well, because his mother chose to bring him home
early and without feeding him crawfish.
How could a mother abandon her son when he needs her the most?
Our 9yr old son,
has been diagnosed Autism Spectrum Disorder, and this was his second major meltdown
that caused his mother to return him home early. The mother of my children decided
twice that it was easier to return our son instead of learning how to deal with
him after he has a major meltdown. I am concerned about this because, of the
repeated behaviors of his mother, I am afraid that my son has learned that he
will return home if he has a meltdown.
The More You know
The children were
told not to charge the tablets and to leave them in their cases by their mother
prior to her leaving for work on the day of the incident. However, the tablets
were not placed out of reach and naturally my son wanted to play with his
tablet. According to my daughter, the babysitter was on the balcony and my son
was in the room with the tablets. My son brought the tablets to the babysitter
when he could not charge them. The broken tablets were placed on top of the
refrigerator afterwards. The tablets that were broken were not iPads. Why is
this relevant? The only tablet my son is experienced with is an iPad, and the
tablets were broken by accident.
Why did I write this response?
I wrote this because
my heart hurts for my son even though he does not understand that he being
treated wrong by his mother. He deserves the same privileges as his sister and “those”
other children. After having fought the school system to have him in “inclusion”
(educated as a normal or typical child), I never thought I would have to deal
with Inclusion issues with his mother!
Final Question?
·
If our daughter or one of the other two children
would have broken the two tablets; would they have been brought home like our
son was?
Please leave a comment below to
share your thoughts with me on this subject matter.
@2014 JSmithjr/The Couponhustla.
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